Diet in bed

A Nevada man chained his 165-pound daughter to her bed so that she could lose 20-25 lbs. He tried locking up the pantry earlier but the girl found a way around it.

He should've just sent her to prison - she would definitely slim down on a prison's diet. Looks like he might be the one losing weight instead.

Bite to eat

A 29 year-old woman in Spring Hill, Florida, bit her 5-year old son to make him eat faster. She was getting him ready for school. The incident came to light when a teacher noticed the bite-mark on the boy's right cheek.

Reminds me of the big, bad wolf in Red Riding Hood. Instead of the wolf, it's mum.

Boy : Mummy what big hands you have.
Mum : All the better to feed you with.
Boy : What big teeth you have.
Mum : All the better to bite you with when you eat too slow. Chomp!

Biting is a great parenting tool when used with temperance and caution. Do not bite hard enough to leave marks. Never apply this tool when angry.

Faeces Fever

A young mother from Austin, Texas was sentenced to 20 years jail for smearing faeces on her three-year old daughter's catheter. She wanted to induce a fever for her daughter so that doctors would continue antibiotic treatments.

If you want to induce fever in a child, here are some simpler and more sanitary alternatives:

1. Spray the child in cold water and stand her in front of the air-conditioner.
2. Let her sleep naked on a cold night.
3. Bundle her into the fridge. Remember to take her out after 15 minutes. It's a fever you're after, not man-slaughter.